Pizza Joe
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In our never-ending search for the Perfect Pizza, Yoshida and Zirkel (the modern Lewis -- or was it Lois? -- & Clark) lead their half-baked expedition biblically north from Bethlehem to Nazareth. The sojourn took about a 25-30 minutes, which is the outer perimeter of our ever-expanding search engine.
Based on the enthusiastic recommendation of a Lehigh student, and the invitation of the Nazareth Chamber of Commerce, we headed for the mythical "Pizza Joe," which rests on an escarpment, called Main Street, looming above Mario Andretti's racy oval.
The decor was, in sophomore Lauren Redeker's lingo, "cozy." Our waitress, Alyssa, who took Eco 1 as a high school scholar last semester at Lehigh, explained that the original proprietor, Joe (as in Guiseppi, not Joseph) retired back to Italy after 17 years of success at this historic location. His successor, Gennaro Bubba, not to be confused with the Deepsouth Bubba, explained that despite the increasing competition he offers the "best pizza in town," with quality being the key.
We ordered our standard sample of a large cheese pie and another pair with mushrooms and sausage, respectively. Doctoral student Lisa Collins observed that the mushrooms were canned. Pizza-Prof. Ron Yoshida characterized the sausage as "Pennsylvania Dutch," which apparently means favorable fennel but otherwise lacking in zest. Heated debates arose regarding the crust; new alumnus Omer Farukhi contended that it was "Styrofoam-like," whereas august alum Dave Sell, who was once the Burger King of Europe, argued that it passed the Volpe tongue-test with the tastefully correct degree of friction. Similarly, soph Julie Paretchan asserted that the crust was too doughy and dry, while to me it had a soupcon of Luigi's memorable brick-oven crust. Professor White solomonically pseudo-settled the matter by pointing out the "definite differentiation between the crust of the plain pizza, which was crispy from tip to edge, and that of the sausage pizza, which was soggier at the base." Achieving closure, adjunct prof. Sharon Yoshida cryptically concluded: "Zamboni."
Everybody, however, agreed that the cheese was the best part -- in Lauren's words, "it doesn't taste fake; the cheese rocks." In senior Kate Leone's more advanced terminology, it was "molto buono."
The various slices, except those laden with sausage, passed the Droop Test with flying tips. The results of the Drip Test were less sanguine, or at least more lubricious.
Based on Olympic scoring, which eliminates the out-liars, the remaining group of eight (the pi-like magic number in Euclid's Thincrusta Matematica) produced an overall rating of 5.5 slices. Super Mario suggests that it may be worth the trip; whether you're Judy, Wopner, or Koch, you be the judge.
Reviewed by:
Ron Yoshida, Dean of the College of Education
Perry Zirkel, Iacocca Professor of Education
Julie Paretchan, Class of '01
Lauren Redeker, Class of '01
Kate Leone, Class of '99
Lisa Collins, Doctoral Student
David Sell, Alumnus
Omer Farukhi, Alumnus
David Sell, Alumnus
Sharon Yoshida, Faculty
George White, Faculty
Pizza Joe Italian Restaurant, 550 South Main St., Nazareth,
(610) 759-8414.
Open Monday thru Saturday from 11:00 am to 10:00 pm
Footnotes
For the account of a trip to Naples, home of 1200 pizzerias, see Christopher Matthews, "In Search of the Perfect Pizza," Readers Digest, December 1998, pp. 60A-60F.
For a fascinating example of this burgeoning field of study, see Griffin Weber & Glenn Weber, "Pizza Combinatorics," College Mathematics Journal, March 1995, pp. 141-43.
This review originally appeared in The Brown and White at Lehigh University in February, 1999.